Landry Jones and David Ash will square off in Saturday’s Red River Rivalry game. (Icon SMI :: Getty Images)

Viewing recommendations for this weekend, for those of you over-saturated with South Carolina-LSU and Stanford-Notre Dame coverage. *See what we did there?

• Best THIS IS STILL A RIVALRY, CONSARNIT. The Red River Shootout, we would argue, has not lost any of its luster with Texas and Oklahoma both slipping out of the AP top 10. (We would also argue that it’ll always be the “Shootout” and never the “Rivalry.”) First of all, to complain that a Nos. 13 vs. 15 matchup is any sort of letdown is to forget how brief this season is in general, and how weird this week’s slate of games is in particular. Ranked-on-ranked action isn’t easy to come by this Saturday. Savor what is there. Second of all, don’t tell grownups that the Longhorns and Sooners might want to beat the snot out of each other that much less just because both teams have been dinged with a loss. Is it nastier when the stakes are higher? We’re not actually sure. Texas is still Texas, Oklahoma is still Oklahoma, fried bubblegum on a stick is still fried bubblegum on a stick and the RRS remains a destination game and appointment television.

• Best reason to eat French fries on a sandwich for brunch. Louisville at Pittsburgh, in one of those curious 11 a.m. ET kickoffs we can never quite perk up for.

• Best rivalry game you’ve never heard of, Week 7 edition. Nevada at UNLV, renewing the Battle for the Fremont Cannon. In general, this blog wants to always come down on the side of teams trading weapons as traveling trophies, be they cannons or axes or boots full of live bees. It’s one of our few guiding principles, and we stand by it.

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Colby Cameron and Johnny Manziel lead two of the nation’s top offenses. Who wins? Or will they decide to film a buddy cop comedy instead? JOHNNY FOOTBALL AND THE COLB-CAM: LOOSE CANNONS. (AP-Stacy Revere/Getty Images)

Our weekly highlight show of lesser FBS luminaries. Non-AQs and independents, be welcome.

It is time. The Ohio Bobcats are 6-0, bowl eligible and unranked and likely to stay that way for a little bit while AQ teams above them take losses and are dropped in the polls accordingly. They’re also not making a great case for Big Important Bowl Inclusion, having allowed three non-AQ teams (Marshall, UMass and Buffalo) to play them closer than their Week 1 opponents at Penn State. Six MAC teams remain on the schedule, not one of which finished 2011 with a winning record and only one of which (Kent State) is currently above .500 in 2012. If the Bobcats plan on ascending into the national Top 25 before the year is out, they’ll have to stage some blowouts.

This week, national spotlights will be trained on Louisiana Tech, a team less likely to go undefeated but more likely to impress the BCS if it does. A matchup viewed as a high-stakes Week 1 upset possibility has only seen its stakes increase since Hurricane Isaac forced a six-week delay, as both LaTech and Texas A&M went and got themselves ranked. Tech’s No. 23 AP ranking is just the second AP nod in program history and its first since 1999. A&M has rattled off four straight wins since dropping its first SEC game to Florida in Week 2, with the final scores ranging from the predictable (70-14 versus South Carolina State) to the uncomfortable (30-27 at Ole Miss).

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We share your bemusement at your stat lines, Tino Sunseri, and offer our sincere congratulations. (AP)

You have two college football games to choose from, this fine Friday evening — and, we assume, several burning questions about them. We’re not here to help you with those questions, for the most part.

Pitt @ Syracuse

• What information do I, the discerning consumer, require in order to consume this game? The Panthers and Orange kick off at 7 p.m. ET in the Carrier Dome. The game will be televised on ESPN and streamed on WatchESPN.

• Why should I care about two teams with a combined record of 3-5 when I could be doing things in the real world on my Friday evening? In fairness to Syracuse, and not just because our boss went there, we’re going to point out that the Orange had to play a tougher first two games than many of their AQ brethren, facing Northwestern and USC in Weeks 1 and 2. Right, and what about losing to Minnesota and beating Stony Brook by only 11 points? NOW THERE. Stony Brook just beat Army! Show some respect, or something.

As for Pitt, at this point we’re tuning in because we’re afraid not to. Watching Panthers football this season has been one series of duck traffic moments after another — as in, it’s like sitting at a stoplight, glancing around and seeing a duck driving a car. That duck, in this case, is Tino Sunseri, right? Correct, and what a majestic waterfowl he’s turned out to be. Pitt has lost to an FCS team and a conference opponent and beaten Virginia Tech and another FCS foe. Through it all, nothing is so jarring as seeing Sunseri put up top-15 pass efficiency numbers.

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Uga IX makes a friend: twitter.com/si_vault/statu…

— Andy Gray (@si_vault) October 2, 2012

We could use a dog photo today. You could, too. Here is Uga IX, né Russ, holding down the fort between the hedges.

• NEWS UPDATE OF VITAL IMPORTANCE, I. “Alabama fan makes emergency landing, leaves plane in field to make Alabama-Ole Miss game.” As one does!

• NEWS UPDATE OF VITAL IMPORTANCE, II. “Couple marries at LSU tailgate” isn’t that surprising of a headline, but let’s turn the floor over to the Louisiana reader who sent this in for commentary and context:

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Robbie ‘Mighty Mouse’ Rouse, out for a leisurely stroll against one of the worst football teams in human memory. (AP)

Our weekly highlight show of lesser FBS luminaries. Non-AQs and independents, be welcome.

Soooo remember last week, when we were all “Robbie Rouse is 79 yards away from becoming Fresno State’s all-time leading rusher, isn’t that swell?” We all know by now what happened next. So while we’ve got Mighty Mouse up on a pedestal, let’s put some of his teammates up there with him.

Video game football doesn’t begin to cover what Fresno State did to Colorado in Week 3; this was more akin to watching a cartoon. Were you aware … 

•  Rouse’s 94-yard touchdown run, the one that made him Fresno State’s all-time leading rusher, wasn’t even the Bulldogs’ longest scoring play of the game? On Fresno State’s prior possession, Derek Carr and Isaiah Burse combined for a 97-yard pitch-and-catch touchdown run.

•  Carr recorded his 300 passing yards and five touchdowns all in the first half?

•  Fresno State’s defense recorded four interceptions and four sacks?

•  Safety Phillip Thomas was responsible for three of those interceptions, two of which he returned for touchdowns?

•  Even the Bulldogs’ punter, Andrew Shapiro, got in on the rout with a career-long 69-yard punt? 

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Assorted bests and worsts from the weekend that was:

Tino Sunseri: Making football things happen since RIGHT NOW, haters. (AP)

• Best gotcha. From Pitt’s sports information department: “Each of Pitt’s five wins over Virginia Tech have come against nationally ranked Hokie squads (No. 13/13 in 2012; No. 5/5 in 2003; No. 3/3 in 2002; No. 12/13 in 2001 and No. 19/20 in 1997).” In other news to make you question whether that blue you’re seeing is really blue, Tino Sunseri is your Big East Offensive Player of the Week.

• Worst portents. First, we offended a couple Twitter followers over the weekend with a lively animated GIF of Smokey’s hindquarters, so if your employer thinks dogs should always wear pants, do not click this link. Second, remember always that the gods of sport are capricious, and never, ever Tempt The Wrath Of The Whatever From High Atop The Thing:

Pastor leading Lord’s Prayer at Neyland Stadium skipped “amen” and went straight to “Go Big Orange!”

— Mark Schlabach (@Mark_Schlabach) September 15, 2012

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Perhaps voters merely admired Bret Bielema’s timely icing of Utah State’s kicker to seal a win over the WAC. Yes. They must have. (AP)

• Down in a poll. Feelin’ so small. Alabama and LSU perch atop the AP Poll. This, for the moment, does not worry us. They will play each other and this will sort itself out for real this time and we continue to believe we will not be subjected to a re-rematch. We must believe. Of greater concern for us, as usual, is what is going on in the bottoms of this exercise in folly we, as a society, continue to refer to as the “Coaches’ Poll.” Wisconsin is ranked. This is problematic and dumb. There are a dozen other stupidities lurking behind this link; can you spot them all?

• Get those Lorax costumes pressed. We’re just a couple short weeks away from the restart of the Harvey Updyke trial, and while from an entertainment standpoint we truly resent this being staged during football season, it’s probably best to get it over with while the whole state’s distracted with football good and football bad.

• Mark Richt, refined meanie. Folks ask us sometimes if we miss cussing a blue streak on the job. We do not, because there are ways to make one’s point without uttering so much as a “consarnit” if you really work at it. It’s like writing poetry with a very strict verse structure. Consider this, from Mark Richt on Sunday, on the subject of Week 4 UGA opponent Vanderbilt: “They have a lot of belief, and they’re playing to win it. They’re doing a good job of it.” The Commodores (1-2) recorded their first win of the season Saturday against Presbyterian, after losing in consecutive weeks to South Carolina and Northwestern.

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Tracking the zeitgeist of college football’s third weekend through social media:

Will the Cougs be Leaching Las Vegas w/ a win?

— Michael Felder (@InTheBleachers) September 15, 2012

Terrible kill by Marquess Wilson. #Pac12Volleyball

— edsbs (@edsbs) September 15, 2012

Very appropriate ending to the football equivalent of raccoons rummaging through garbage cans. Sure it’s fun to watch, but what a mess.

— Ralph D. Russo (@ralphDrussoAP) September 15, 2012

@edsbs Too bad Carter had to give up the magician gig due to ESPN’s ‘no Christian magicians’ policy. Same thing happened to Olbermann.

— Flubber McGee (@FlubberMcGee) September 15, 2012

Deon Bucannon’s four-way head turn there was magnificent toddler-opera: 1. “DAWG!” 2 wait 3. Naw I was– 4. DANG [flag]

— edsbs (@edsbs) September 15, 2012

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Loud, long and sincere applause for Manti Te’o, y’all. (AP)

Snap Judgments from the evening Week 3 slate. For more coverage, check out our early Snaps, midday Snaps, Alabama-Arkansas recap, Cal-Ohio State recap, Stanford-USC recap and complete Top 25 review.

• No. 20 Notre Dame 20, No. 10 Michigan State 3. That Michigan State scored at all in tonight’s contest is something of a minor miracle, particularly taking into account certain other fateful kicks we’ve seen go awry today. Dan Conroy made a successful 50-yard field goal with four minutes remaining in the first half, the Spartans’ lone scoreboard contribution of the evening. Michigan State’s Andrew Maxwell was sacked four times (giving him the unenviable rushing stat of -28 yards), barely completed half his passes, and accounted for 187 of his team’s 237 yards of offense. Le’Veon Bell, he of the 44-carry, 210-yard outing against Boise State, contributed 19 rushes for 77 yards.

Everett Golson’s completion percentage was even poorer, but he made one crucial pass count early, hitting John Goodman in the end zone for a backwards leaping touchdown catch you’ll be seeing frequently on highlight reels this weekend. Cierre Wood, George Atkinson and Thewo Riddick contributed 56-, 43- and 30-yard rushing performances for the Irish.

Points aside, all Irish eyes were focused on star linebacker Manti Te’o, performing admirably just days after the deaths of his girlfriend and grandmother. Te’o recorded 12 tackles (seven solo) and two pass breakups. [BOX | RECAP] Read More…

ULM quarterback Kolton Browning edged the Warhawks past Arkansas and into history. (Wesley Hitt/Getty Images)

Our weekly highlight show of lesser FBS luminaries. Non-AQs and independents, be welcome.

• HAIL TO THE SUN BELT, SURE IS A FUN BELT, RA RA RA! What could top Utah State’s thrilling Friday night victory over Utah? Nothing short of Louisiana-Monroe taking a top 10 SEC team to overtime, on the road, and pulling out the win on a fourth-down quarterback dash. Said quarterback, Kolton Browning, has since been named Davey O’Brien Quarterback of the Week and a Walter Camp National Player of the Week honoree. Browning accounted for 481 of ULM’s 550 yards of offense, and four of the Warhawks’ five touchdowns. The Warhawks have their first win over a ranked team since leveling up to FBS, and to round out the weekly awards, have been named Week 2′s Tostitos Fiesta Bowl National Team of the Week. Last week it was Ohio. (A moment of cynicism: We love the attention being bestowed on non-AQs more than just about anybody right now, but this Tostitos shout out is pretty adorable considering how nigh-impossible it would be for the Bobcats or the Warhawks to actually make it into the Fiesta Bowl.)

• It is barely Week 3 and we are already out of poll puns. Idle in Week 2, Boise State is unranked in both major polls for the first time in four years. BYU is the only ranked team in this week’s AP Poll at No. 25, with Boise State, ULM (whee!), Ohio and Utah State also receiving votes. The Aggies’ lone vote is the program’s first since 1966; the Warhawks’ 23 are their first in team history. We hesitate to even mention the Coaches’ Poll for fear of helping its continued legitimacy, but teams receiving votes from disinterested voting SIDs include Boise State, BYU, Louisiana Tech, Ohio, Nevada and ULM.

• EA Sports loves USA, after all. EA Sports personnel have been spotted in Mobile, making preparations to incorporate South Alabama into the next edition of NCAA Football.

• The best news. Tulane’s Devon Walker is reportedly “alert and responsive” following spinal surgery. Tulane has set up an assistance fund in his name; for more ways to support the Walker family, click here.

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