Too late, science. (AP)

Three power college football conferences — the SEC, Pac-12 and Big 12 — will outfit players with monitoring devices during the 2013 season, and not for the usual court-mandated reasons! Electronic trackers will relay players’ actions on the field as if they’re dangerous and mysterious wild critters with inexplicable movements and consumptive habits to be studied. We’re not really kidding; to hear Steve Shaw tell it to AL.com, at this point the experiment will be science for science’s sake, which is always interesting:

“I think it really is more for tracking how fast a player is moving and the direction of his movements so you have an electronic signature of all of that … Then what you do with that, we have to figure that out. You could track speed before a collision and that sort of thing. To be honest, I’m not sure what all of the applications are. But it has potential benefit in player safety, so I think it’s worth taking an initial step to see what the technology does.”

While we’re looking forward to the herd of Jurassic Park jokes this will unleash (they spared no expense!), our one regret is that this endeavor launches too late to enable a full study of the aerodynamic properties of Will Goggans’ beard.

De’Anthony Thomas torched Oregon State for 122 rushing yards and three scores. (Jonathan Ferrey/Getty Images)

Snap Judgments from the Week 13 midday flight. For more, check out Friday’s Snaps, Saturday’s early Snaps, Saturday’s late Snaps, our recaps of Michigan-Ohio State, Florida-Florida State and Notre Dame-USC and our complete Top 25 review.

• No. 5 Oregon 48, No. 16 Oregon State 24. Despite the typically gaudy final score for the Ducks, this game was close well into the third quarter. Two De’Anthony Thomas touchdowns in just more than two minutes, separated by a Beavers fumble on a kickoff return, put the game out of reach. And Oregon being Oregon, the Ducks piled on just a bit, with Kenjon Barner and Marcus Mariota adding another pair of touchdowns around a second-down Sean Mannion interception. Turnovers completely hamstrung Oregon State this afternoon; the Beavers committed six in all, including three interceptions that killed off three of their four final drives.

While the Ducks’ most memorable defensive plays occurred in the air, their offensive attack was confined largely to the ground. Mariota completed 17-of-24 attempts for 139 yards and a touchdown and rushed for an additional 85 yards and a score. The best of these: a 42-yard touchdown run just more than two minutes into the first quarter. Ahead of him in rushing: Barner, with 221 yards and two scores on 29 carries, and Thomas, with 122 yards and three scores on 17 attempts.

Read More…

Monteé Ball’s last name is also a football word, which should save us all some headline writing time once he finally breaks this record. (AP)

Saturday college football games of varying degrees of interest, grouped in highly subjective categories. For more preview content, visit Andy Staples’ Walkthrough.

• Biggest game with nothing riding on it: No. 6 Ohio State at Wisconsin, 3:30 p.m. ET. The Badgers already know they’re headed to Indianapolis, as the only other teams with fewer than three conference losses in the Leaders Division (the Buckeyes and Penn State) are ineligible for postseason play. But a win here would be the biggest [screw]-you moment for Urban Meyer since the 2008 Florida-Georgia game. And if you think Urban Meyer doesn’t live for [screw]-you moments, please see the 2008 Florida-Georgia game.

What is actually at stake: The NCAA all-time career touchdowns record, currently sitting at 78 and held by former Miami RedHawk Travis Prentice. Monteé Ball is one score away from tying and two away from breaking this record, and he has a chance to do both at home. He recorded 198 rushing yards and three scores last week against Indiana; if Ball does break the record, expect to hear the hollering in Madison as far away as Kentucky, and expect little bits of glitter to spew from this page. (Please protect your eyes accordingly.)

• Biggest game we feel like we couldn’t predict if our lives depended on it: No. 21 USC at No. 17 UCLA, 3:05 p.m. We have well established at this point in the season that even when relying on math and the best available logic, picking games is tricky work. It’s much more fun, and equally ineffective, to rely on factors like spite and cussedness and probably-imaginary-but-maybe-not-surefire jinxes to decide, particularly in rivalry matchups, which is why this weekend’s clash in the Rose Bowl scares the hell out of us. Some factors to consider: Whose coach to dislike (or grudgingly admire) more? Is it cosmically dangerous to even bring up that “football monopoly” talk at this point? Can we straight-up call this game for USC because keeping an opposing team’s costumed representative from poking one’s field with a sword is the furthest possible thing from a power move imaginable?

Read More…

What glories yet await Cory Dorris and the Golden Hurricane as Conference USA play continues? (AP)

Our weekly highlight show of lesser FBS luminaries. Non-AQs and independents, be welcome.

Tis the season for car commercials with big-ass bows and conference math. We attempted to explain, in bewildering detail, how the MAC races could shake out from here in our Wednesday night MACtion preview. We are here to inform you (with some glee, as we adore late-season chaos) that the MAC has far from the most convoluted conference race situation at the moment. Very quickly, the current states of the remaining non-AQ conference races, as teams not named Navy or BYU begin to prettify themselves for postseason suitors:

• Conference USA: Two teams with perfect 6-0 league play records top the two divisions: Central Florida in the East and Tulsa in the West. After Saturday, one squad’s record will bear some blemish when the two clash in Tulsa, but don’t expect that to affect the race. The Knights have only UAB to clear after that in the regular season, and hold a head-to-head advantage over East Carolina, the only other team in the division with fewer than three conference losses. Tulsa’s championship game aspirations could still be spoiled with a loss tonight and another at SMU November 24, assuming the Mustangs (4-2 in league play) beat Rice in the meantime.

Read More…

Eyes on the prize, Colby Cameron. (AP)

Our weekly highlight show of lesser FBS luminaries. Non-AQs and independents, be welcome.

• Broncos and Bulldogs and bustin’. If you follow our pre- and midseason Crystal Ball projections, you know how hilariously bad we are at predicting which teams will land in which bowl games. But after a second loss, even Boise State’s new-money brand-name recognition won’t keep the Broncos afloat in the polls. So what does this mean for our early-season busting favorites, the Louisiana Tech Bulldogs? Quoth our designated postseason prognosticator, Stewart Mandel: “Louisiana Tech, No. 20 in the standings this week, may be that group’s lone hope, but the Bulldogs need to beat 8-2 Utah State in two weeks, climb at least four spots and hope BCS No. 16 Nebraska loses so that Tech finishes ahead of an AQ champ.” Same as it ever was when it comes to non-AQs with aspirations of crashing the party: Win big, and hope bigger. A perfect run through November won’t be easy for LaTech. Texas State should pose no problem in Week 11, but neither Utah State nor San Jose State are any kind of pushover.

Sonny Dykes, as ever, prefers to marvel at where he’s gotten this team once he gets there, and only then: “If we go and do not play well Saturday, Texas State will beat us and that will end all of the discussion. We have to worry about playing well this week, and like I said, when it is all over with, we will kind of look up and say, ‘Wow, here we are.’”

Read More…

Assorted bests and worsts from college football’s week that was:

• Best throwback (see what we did there?): Can’t go wrong with a classic, can we, Aaron Murray?

• Unofficial Heisman winner of our hearts: AJ McCarron, but not for the football-related reasons you might think. No, Alabama’s quarterback won our undying allegiance much earlier in the day, after dropping this little number on GameDay:

AJ McCarron to ESPN on handling wrath of Saban: “I always mess with him. I always say it kind of makes you feel as small as him.”

— Jon Solomon (@jonsol) November 3, 2012

Read More…

Michigan State’s Mark Dantonio can get WAY grouchier than this. You’ll see. (AP)

Your oddly specific Saturday viewing guide. For more football-centric preview content, check out Andy Staples’ Walkthrough.

• Most locally sourced farm-to-fan football. In-state rivalries abound in Week 8, for those of you keeping vigilant watches on your carbon footprints. Saturday’s sustainably-grown grudge matches include No. 22 Stanford at Cal (3 p.m. ET), Michigan State at No. 23 Michigan (3:30 p.m.) and No. 12 Florida State at Miami (8 p.m.).

• Worst idea for a noon kickoff in recorded human history. Or maybe “best idea in terms of public safety,” but we’re still calling an 11 a.m. CT kickoff for LSU at Texas A&M the worst kind of cowardice. Who wants to live forever?

• Saddest ball of football sadness. Army (1-5) at Eastern Michigan (0-6), the latter of which we really did call “the country’s best winless team” on the Mandel Initiative podcast earlier this week. We meant every word of that. (HONORABLE MENTIONS: Boston College, already with a loss to this Army team, has to play a Georgia Tech team that’s already lost to Middle Tennessee State; and FAU-South Alabama, which will play in the One Of You is Getting Off The Floor Of The Sun Belt Whether You Want To Or Not Classic.)

Read More…

• Sailors would guide entire journeys by it, but the joke was on them. Are we ever so happy as when another school comes out with a football-themed rap video? We really think not:

The best part of this particular contribution to the field of college football-themed music videos is that it’s school-sanctioned, and cannot therefore be written off as the actions of a mere fringe group. We like to think the bewildered-looking girl functions as a kind of silent Greek chorus here. We’re right with you, honey.

• Western Kentucky 31, Troy 26. The Hilltoppers remain undefeated in conference play in a deep Sun Belt, along with the Warhawks and Ragin’ Cajuns. [BOX | RECAP]

• Tulsa 33, UTEP 11. Filed under “Thing UTEP Did This Week:” Achieved the elusive scoreboard elevener! [BOX | RECAP]

• Arizona State 51, Colorado 17. A 17-point second quarter for the Buffs had us feeling pretty bad about our predicted Sun Devils blowout win. That feeling did not last too long. [BOX | RECAP]

Read More…

The Hilltoppers rightfully expect big plays from Jonathan Dowling, who has pulled in four interceptions in 2012. (AP)

Finally, that blessed time of year where Thursdays fill up with college football. We’re sure you have so many questions. And we’re here to help, sort of. Kickoff times and TV listings for tonight’s action are as follows:

Western Kentucky @ Troy

• What information do I, the discerning consumer, require in order to consume this game? The Hilltoppers and Trojans kick off at 7:30 p.m. ET. The game will be televised on ESPNU and streamed on WatchESPN.

• What am I watching for here? WKU should be able to run the ball with some ease, but we’re really looking forward to seeing the Hilltoppers’ defense, particularly Jonathan Dowling, who has hauled in four interceptions in four games played. He’ll go up against Corey Robinson and Troy’s prolific passing attack.

• What’s at stake? With a win, the Hilltoppers remain undefeated in conference play and at the top of the Sun Belt standings with the Warhawks and Ragin’ Cajuns.

Read More…