Frank Solich is standing on a bed of nails right now and you can’t even tell. (AP)

A previous version of this post reported that the Ohio Bobcats football team will be presenting its regular Coffee with the Coach event, featuring head Bobcats coach Frank Solich, on Friday, March 29 at 10:15 a.m. in Athens’ Union Street Diner. Contrary to our earlier report, the event will not feature Frank Solich smiling while holding his hand in a scalding pot of coffee and daring all onlookers to do the same. We regret the error.

Could Kyle Brotzman’s notorious miss against Nevada in 2010 be a boon for Boise State? (Peter Read Miller/SI)

Stanford’s offensive coordinator position was recently endowed by an anonymous donor to honor Andrew Luck (gross autoplay video alert at that link). The donation got friend of the program The Gurgling Cod thinking about how to turn this into a rivalry game:

UGA FAN PROTIP — make anon gift to GT, name OC position after Reggie Ball. #trollanthropy espn.go.com/college-footba…

— The Gurgling Cod (@TheGurglingCod) May 23, 2012

Monied fans, you have your marching orders. Our previous bloggy home has just wrapped up an annual charity drive in which donations are given to match rivalry scores (say, $70.33 for enthusiastic fans of January’s Orange Bowl outcome), but an endowment? Oh, that’s a gift that lasts and lasts. We have 10 modest suggestions for our readers overburdened with spite and disposable income:

Read More…

Should the SEC be targeting the Missouri Tigers, or Southeast Missouri Redhawks? (US PRESSWIRE)

The Big Ten has 12 teams; the Big 12 has 10 for now, but soon may not even crack the double-digit mark. The Pac-12 has welcomed teams from states that do not border any ocean, let alone the Pacific, and could be poised to welcome several more programs from even further inland.

And while the SEC accepting a runaway Texas A&M outfit as if it is some sort of boarding house is the falling anvil dangling by a rope above a Rube Goldberg device of towering proportions (that rope is on fire, as it happens, and the candle burning through it is powered by the Longhorn Network — just go with me here, y’all), the conference that housed the last five national championship teams has remained (officially, at least) halfway sound in terms of both geography and numbers. Texas is a southerly state, if not an easterly one; there will be no cheeky editorial cartoons in your local paper over the futility of continuing to refer to the conference by its given name.

So far.

In its reported dalliances with Missouri, the SEC is abandoning everything southish and eastish for a grab at a midwestern television market. In its rampantly rumored (and stupid) denial of West Virginia’s application to break ranks with the splintering Big East, the SEC has turned away a cultural fit, if not a cartographic one. This veering from one ill-advised choice to the next screams of a need for steady guidance, from a hand well-experienced in coloring in bunches of maps so countries of the same color never touch. To that end, I provide free of charge this handy list of schools which college football’s premier conference ought to begin pursuing with all possible haste. You’ll find these suggested additions completely bulletproof to ridicule, as all institutions listed are located in the southeastern quadrants of their respective states. It’s almost too easy. Read More…

Will Muschamp called his Florida Gators “a very immature football team” following a disappointing Wednesday scrimmage, kept his assistants at work until the wee hours going over everything that went wrong and, according to Jason Lieser, took out his frustrations on his staff in a most heartless fashion:

Wait, including Spider-Man 3? Muschamp. You monster.