Mario Cristobal, as far as we know, is not related to Ron Turner, but you never know. (AP)

Ron Turner’s new staffing plan at Florida International has seemingly been based — up to this point — on hiring as many coaches related to Ron Turner as he can find. (The Miami Herald did a marvelously succinct summary of the collection earlier this month, when Turner sons Cameron and Morgan were brought on board with the Golden Panthers: “Morgan Turner joins brother Cameron Turner, FIU’s quarterbacks and wide receivers coach. Ron Turner, who’ll serve as his own offensive coordinator, knows the younger Turners the same way. He knew their mother, Wendy Turner, first.”)

Turner’s scheme took a significant hit Tuesday with the departure of Morgan to Stanford, where he’ll coach tight ends. Morgan had served as an assistant on the Cardinal’s staff since 2010 before joining up with his family FIU in early February. Choosing between life in Miami or Palo Alto? It’s a rough life young Morgan Turner leads. Per Turner-the-Elder’s official school bio, he has no remaining sons left to fill the void created by Morgan’s absence.

DeWayne Walker set the coaching carousel spinning once more with his late departure from New Mexico State. (AP)

Tommy Tuberville’s sitting by the phone* and Jimmy Sexton’s got that particular sparkle in his eye. It can mean only one thing: The coach firin’ season is upon us once more. We’ll be tracking the carousel of progress, right here, for as long as it takes to stop spinning. Raise a glass to times past, won’t you? * Well, not anymore, but never tell us we don’t have the gift of very specific prophecy through throwaway jokes.

New Mexico State [updated 02.01.2013]

• Who’s out: DeWayne Walker, who jumps to the NFL with less than two weeks remaining between now and Signing Day. And not even for a coordinating gig: Walker will coach defensive backs for the Jacksonville Jaguars. Walker released the following statement through the athletic department: “I really appreciate the opportunity that Dr. Boston and New Mexico State gave me to be a Division I head football coach. Unfortunately, I did not get the program as far as I would have liked from a wins and losses standpoint. But, we do have a better locker room, better kids and a better foundation for the program moving forward. There are a lot of people that I want to thank for their support and will be reaching out to those individuals in the coming days. They have helped me in moving the program forward. I am excited about starting a new chapter in my coaching career, as is my family. I wish New Mexico State great success in the future and wish everyone the best. Go Aggies!” • Who’s in: Doug Martin — the one who played at Kentucky, not the one who played at Boise State. Although if Martin The Younger is really so opposed to his excellent nickname, we’re gonna refer to Martin The Elder as coach Muscle Hamster instead. It’s been a whirlwind courtship for Martin and the Aggies: He was announced as offensive coordinator on January 17, temporarily promoted to interim head coach on January 24 and will be officially announced as DeWayne Walker’s successor on Monday, February 4. Martin’s previous head coaching experience consists of a seven-year stint at Kent State, from 2004-2010. Read More…