By Holly Anderson

Every once in a while, we forget that this is Ron English’s Twitter bio:

Usually, something reminds us; in this case, it is Eastern Michigan offering the opportunity to go skydiving with Ron English:

To outdo himself once again, if the 10th Annual Golf Outing raises $60,000, he is going to skydive. That is not all, you can join him! Through the popular crowdfunding platform IndieGoGo, fans and supporters of the football program can donate to the Time to FLY campaign and receive perks for their charitable gift. One of these gifts is the opportunity to ride from Ypsilanti to Skydive Tecumseh with Coach English, spend the day with him and eventually ride in the plane and skydive with him.

Florida incoming transfer Darious Cummings is going by “Bear” Cummings. What do you guys want to be called?

— Jason Lieser (@PBPjasonlieser) January 15, 2013

• How would he feel about “Bearious” for more formal occasions? If we’re all supposed to be taking after forest creatures for a fresh new look for spring 2013, we would like to be referred to from here on as “Killer Otter.” Thank you for your attention to this matter.

• And speaking of spring. Army’s spring game, which graced our neck of the woods at Fort Benning last year, continues its freshly-established traveling tradition with a March 8 scrimmage set to take place at Fort Hood, Texas.

• The Coliseum just needs a place to crash for a few days, until it gets things figured out. The Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum Commission is behind in its rent, per the L.A. Times, but once it gets its free-range vegan water bottle business up and running things are really going to turn around. It’s not a pyramid scheme. It’s not!

• That’s a helluva windbreak. Texas Tech approves plans for a “freestanding high-definition video board,” theoretically to be installed and operational in time for the 2013 season.

Read More…

Rex Burkhead goes out with a bang. (AP)

Snap Judgments from Friday afternoon’s action. For more, check out Saturday’s early Snaps and our complete Top 25 review.

• No. 17 Nebraska 13, Iowa 7. Bo Pelini was asked in his postgame on-field interview whose decision it was to insert the oft-injured Rex Burkhead into the Huskers’ final regular-season game. He laughed. “His!” The senior standout, absent for much of this season while nursing a knee injury, made the most of his time on the turf, leading Nebraska’s ground attack (69 yards on 16 carries) and scoring the Huskers’ only touchdown of the contest on a three-yard run in the third quarter.

Those of you who find our occasional gleeful odes to MACtion tacky are in for a real treat with today’s box score, where you will find just one player with an individual stat line totaling more than 100 yards. (The lucky lad: Taylor Martinez, who completed 9 of 14 passes for 63 yards and rushed for an additional 41.) Burkhead was trailed  by Ameer Abdullah (50 rushing yards on 14 carries) and Braylon Heard (46 yards on four carries). For the Hawkeyes, James Vandenberg completed 11 of 24 pass attempts for 92 yards and threw two interceptions. Mark Weisman led Iowa in rushing with 91 yards on 29 attempts.

Vandenberg also gave the Hawkeyes their only lead of the game, with a one-yard rushing touchdown late in the first quarter, a lead Iowa hung onto until Burkhead’s run. And for a moment there, late in the fourth quarter, it looked as though we might have a ballgame on our hands again. Given the ball on a Nebraska punt at their own 27 with about three and a half minutes to play, the Hawkeyes executed two consecutive six-yard plays before Vandenberg threw his second interception with just 2:11 remaining on the clock. And practically before time had expired in the stadium, we had that all-important BIG TEN CHAMPIONSHIP GAME TICKETS: ON SALE NOW email land in our inbox. The Huskers have earned at least a share of the division title and will play Wisconsin in Indianapolis on Saturday, December 1. Nebraska won their first meeting in September, 30-27. [BOX | RECAP]

Read More…

Monteé Ball’s last name is also a football word, which should save us all some headline writing time once he finally breaks this record. (AP)

Saturday college football games of varying degrees of interest, grouped in highly subjective categories. For more preview content, visit Andy Staples’ Walkthrough.

• Biggest game with nothing riding on it: No. 6 Ohio State at Wisconsin, 3:30 p.m. ET. The Badgers already know they’re headed to Indianapolis, as the only other teams with fewer than three conference losses in the Leaders Division (the Buckeyes and Penn State) are ineligible for postseason play. But a win here would be the biggest [screw]-you moment for Urban Meyer since the 2008 Florida-Georgia game. And if you think Urban Meyer doesn’t live for [screw]-you moments, please see the 2008 Florida-Georgia game.

What is actually at stake: The NCAA all-time career touchdowns record, currently sitting at 78 and held by former Miami RedHawk Travis Prentice. Monteé Ball is one score away from tying and two away from breaking this record, and he has a chance to do both at home. He recorded 198 rushing yards and three scores last week against Indiana; if Ball does break the record, expect to hear the hollering in Madison as far away as Kentucky, and expect little bits of glitter to spew from this page. (Please protect your eyes accordingly.)

• Biggest game we feel like we couldn’t predict if our lives depended on it: No. 21 USC at No. 17 UCLA, 3:05 p.m. We have well established at this point in the season that even when relying on math and the best available logic, picking games is tricky work. It’s much more fun, and equally ineffective, to rely on factors like spite and cussedness and probably-imaginary-but-maybe-not-surefire jinxes to decide, particularly in rivalry matchups, which is why this weekend’s clash in the Rose Bowl scares the hell out of us. Some factors to consider: Whose coach to dislike (or grudgingly admire) more? Is it cosmically dangerous to even bring up that “football monopoly” talk at this point? Can we straight-up call this game for USC because keeping an opposing team’s costumed representative from poking one’s field with a sword is the furthest possible thing from a power move imaginable?

Read More…

Everybody who wants to see the national championship trophy filled with marzipan, thumbs up! (AP)

Saturday games of varying degrees of interest, grouped in highly subjective categories. For more in-depth preview content, visit Andy Staples’ Walkthrough.

• Biggest game we feel like we couldn’t predict if our lives depended on it: No. 3 Kansas State at TCU, 7:00 p.m. ET. We’re still harboring a dream that seemed far-fetched just a few short weeks ago, a dream inspired by Tom Fornelli suggesting that if Bill Snyder takes home the crystal football this year, he’ll break it in half and make two hard candy dishes. The ‘Cats, at 9-0, are one of six undefeated teams remaining in FBS play. No gimme games remain, but then again, they haven’t played a gimme game since Oct. 6 against Kansas. In their past three outings, they’ve beaten three ranked opponents by a combined score of 154-68.

The Horned Frogs, no slouches on defense, will pose a greater threat to K-State’s undefeated season if the Wildcats take the field without starting quarterback Collin Klein. The Heisman frontrunner’s status for Saturday has been carefully guarded almost since the moment of his injury during last week’s game against Oklahoma State. It’s entirely possible we could see this contest played out without either team fielding the quarterbacks that topped the depth charts at the year’s outset. Only one thing is for certain: This will be the purplest football contest of the regular season.

Read More…

Stephen Morris and Miami crushed Virginia Tech Thursday night to stay ahead in the ACC Coastal Division race. (Joel Auerbach/Getty Images)

• Miami 30, Virginia Tech 12. Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: An ibis and a turkey walk into the bar, and the bartender says: “Wait, so Virginia Tech can’t even hang on special teams anymore?” Logan Thomas threw for 199 yards and rushed for 124 more, including a 73-yard touchdown run early in the second quarter. No other Hokie entered the end zone last night, or managed a score of any kind in the entire second half. The specter of an all-Florida ACC championship game looms, unless Duke gets its way. And isn’t the possibility of Duke getting its way one of the more purely delightful things about this season? [RECAP | BOX]

• Ohio 45, Eastern Michigan 14. Congratulations to the Bobcats for their best win over a one-win team all season. Derrius Vick is as surprised as we are. [RECAP | BOX]

• Middle Tennessee State 34, Western Kentucky 29. The Blue Raiders and Hilltoppers hit the locker rooms at halftime tied 17-17, and traded scores throughout the final two quarters. MTSU scored the final touchdown, but WKU went down swinging with a safety-producing stop of Logan Kilgore in the final five seconds. [RECAP | BOX]

• Sandusky case update. Former Penn State president Graham Spanier was formally charged Thursday with perjury, obstruction, endangering the welfare of children, failure to properly report suspected abuse and conspiracy relating to his handling of the Jerry Sandusky case. Additional charges were also filed against Tim Curley and Gary Schultz. SI’s Michael Rosenberg has more.

• BIG OL’ BREAKING NEWS. BCS bowls would consider inviting a two-loss Notre Dame team? WELL, I NEVER.

Read More…

If he’s as good at passing as he is at pointing, Tyler Tettleton could move into second place in all-time career passing yards at Ohio Thursday night. (AP)

Your Thursday night television viewing schedule is cluttered with college football this week. You must have so many questions. We’re here to help. 

Eastern Michigan at Ohio

• What information do I, the discerning consumer, require in order to consume this game? The Eagles and Bobcats are scheduled to kick off in Peden Stadium at 6 p.m. ET. The game will be televised on ESPNU and streamed on WatchESPN.

• So this will be a joyless romp, right? The Bobcats should be playing angry after losing to Miami (Ohio) for the first time since 2005 and being knocked out of contention for a major bowl, right? We’re not so sure. This might be a joyless non-romp, if the previous month or so is any indication. Every FBS team the Bobcats have played since Week 2′s rout of New Mexico State has given them fits. Eastern Michigan is a 1-7 team (albeit one that we at one point called the best 0-6 team in America) playing an Ohio program that’s gone from gunning for an undefeated season to not even necessarily being favored to win its own division. And again, on paper this should be an easy win for Frank Solich and Friends. Eastern hasn’t beaten Ohio since 1999, and it hasn’t beaten the Bobcats in Athens since 1994. But just look how the Bobcats played UMass, Buffalo and Akron with a potential BCS bowl bid on the line. Watching this game with interest: Kent State, which holds an identical 7-1 overall record, is currently undefeated in conference play and gets the Bobcats at home to close out the regular season.

Read More…

Michigan State’s Mark Dantonio can get WAY grouchier than this. You’ll see. (AP)

Your oddly specific Saturday viewing guide. For more football-centric preview content, check out Andy Staples’ Walkthrough.

• Most locally sourced farm-to-fan football. In-state rivalries abound in Week 8, for those of you keeping vigilant watches on your carbon footprints. Saturday’s sustainably-grown grudge matches include No. 22 Stanford at Cal (3 p.m. ET), Michigan State at No. 23 Michigan (3:30 p.m.) and No. 12 Florida State at Miami (8 p.m.).

• Worst idea for a noon kickoff in recorded human history. Or maybe “best idea in terms of public safety,” but we’re still calling an 11 a.m. CT kickoff for LSU at Texas A&M the worst kind of cowardice. Who wants to live forever?

• Saddest ball of football sadness. Army (1-5) at Eastern Michigan (0-6), the latter of which we really did call “the country’s best winless team” on the Mandel Initiative podcast earlier this week. We meant every word of that. (HONORABLE MENTIONS: Boston College, already with a loss to this Army team, has to play a Georgia Tech team that’s already lost to Middle Tennessee State; and FAU-South Alabama, which will play in the One Of You is Getting Off The Floor Of The Sun Belt Whether You Want To Or Not Classic.)

Read More…

Can Quinton Patton and Louisiana Tech shake off Johnny Football and bully through the WAC? (AP)

Our weekly highlight show of lesser FBS luminaries. Non-AQs and independents, be welcome:

We made the trek to Shreveport last week in the hopes of being on the scene when 2012′s best chance for a BCS bust really took shape. We came perilously close to getting our wish; but for a blocked extra point attempt here and a successful two-point conversion there, America would be staring down the real possibility of another WAC team in a BCS bowl game.

Right now, it’s hard to imagine that being the case. We said in our midseason Crystal Ball segment, and several of our colleagues agreed, that the odds for an upstart squad in a big-money game this season look grim, with Louisiana Tech and Boise State each carrying a loss from their highest-profile nonconference games and Ohio undefeated but eking out wins against the likes of UMass, Buffalo and Akron. Is there a spark of hope for any of our precious Profiteroles?

Maybe. The Broncos enjoy the benefit of name recognition after their last several seasons, and popped up at No. 22 in the first set of BCS standings released Sunday. It’s their 38th straight such appearance, and the longest active BCS rankings streak in the FBS. Could they climb into that all-important No. 16 spot ahead of an AQ conference champion? Could Louisiana Tech, with a stronger nonconference schedule and blowouts the rest of the way, jump the Broncos?

Read More…

Markus Wheaton caught nine passes for 150 yards and a touchdown in Oregon State’s upset win. (Getty Images)

Snap Judgments from the Week 4 afternoon slate. For more coverage, check out our early Snaps, late Snaps and complete Top 25 review. Also check out our coverage of Florida State-Clemson, Kansas State-Oklahoma and Notre Dame-Michigan.

• Oregon State 27, UCLA 20: Through three weeks, UCLA’s Johnathan Franklin led the nation in rushing thanks to the generosity of Rice, Nebraska and Houston, rolling up 541 yards and three touchdowns. Today against Oregon State, he recorded 45 yards on 12 carries. UCLA would finish with just 71 net yards rushing, though quarterback Brett Hundley seemed perfectly happy to just produce all of the Bruins’ offense by himself. Hundley completed 27-of-42 pass attempts for 386 yards and a touchdown. A gaudy total, but nobody’s handing out points for high passing numbers. (Somewhere tonight, Les Miles is startled to hear this.)

On the opposite sideline, how many lay people outside the Pac-12 could even name Oregon State’s starting quarterback heading into this season? Sean Mannion had a memorable star turn on a career night, with 379 yards through the air and two touchdown passes. You want gaudy? Behold the stat lines of his most favored targets: Brandin Cooks, with six catches for 173 yards, and Markus Wheaton, with nine catches for 150 yards.

Spinning this forward: What on earth are we to make of the Beavers, who’ve now beaten their second ranked opponent in as many tries after going 3-9 overall a year ago? Oregon State could make it three in a row if next week’s foe, current No. 22 Arizona, is still ranked after tonight’s meeting with No. 3 Oregon. Either way, that game certainly looks more interesting than it did a month ago. [RECAP | BOX]

Read More…