Posted September 20, 2013

Virginia Tech’s Hokie Bird is getting its ‘hot diggity tan on’ while rollerblading

Mascots, This Is Satire

Mascots have too much time on their hands. How are fans supposed to take them seriously if they’re not focused on the upcoming week’s game? What kind of role model does this on a Friday, just one day before Virginia Tech is set to play Marshall? I’m ashamed. There are kids out there watching these mascots goofing off and screwing around. If someone doesn’t speak up, things are only going to get worse.

What ever happened to honor and to devotion to one’s craft? Heck, soon we’ll see mascots fighting in the streets, staying out past curfew and drag-racing minibikes. I, for one, will not stand for this. They’re making a mockery of football and a fool out of all of us.

(Note: Absolutely none of this is serious.)

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