Twitter roundup: Week 11 Laff Riot

The story of a season, as told through social media. 

Normally I’d be pissed at my body for getting sick on a Friday, but it’s just protecting me from Pitt-UConn.

— sir broosk (@celebrityhottub) November 10, 2012

You’ll watch Pitt-UConn because there are starving kids in February-August who don’t get any football

— Bobby Big Wheel (@BobbyBigWheel) November 10, 2012

CESSPITT

— Spilly (@IAmSpilly) November 10, 2012

My favorite thing about David Pollack is that he will never stop saying “dude” on national television

— Grimey (@loljocks_grimey) November 9, 2012

Ron Cherry explaining financial cliff would fix everything

— Mark Schlabach (@Mark_Schlabach) November 9, 2012

Florida State has punted the ball more times than it has rushing yards.

— Ben Jones (@Ben_Jones88) November 9, 2012

sometimes i like to pretend bud foster’s lunch pail is like the suitcase in pulp fiction but with a thermos

— Martin Rickman (@martinrickman) November 9, 2012

Heading to Stillwater Oklahoma this weekend. Excited to be around another mascot that carries a real gun with him!

— Jon Kimble, Mtnr (@WVUMascot) November 8, 2012

I’M ON A GOAT twitter.com/lukezim/status…

— Luke Zimmermann (@lukezim) November 10, 2012

You kind of have to respect a program who uses Arial Narrow as their primary helmet font.

— Peter (@runthedive) November 10, 2012

.@northwesternu, we have to talk about that commercial. It’s like Seasonal Affective Disorder personified.

— abby (@abbyjaye) November 10, 2012

Give Texas credit. They announced their opening formation to the opponent and still gained 42 yards.

— Stewart Mandel (@slmandel) November 10, 2012

Anyone else get the feeling that this is shaping up to be one of “those days” in college football? Dog games on paper. Not so much…

— Pete Thamel(@SIPeteThamel) November 10, 2012

Devin Gardner is clearly Denard Robinson’s equal when it comes to wild, desperate jump balls.

— Matt Hinton (@MattRHinton) November 10, 2012

I can not believe Dooley played for OT there. He’s getting booed and deserves it. No marbles there.

— govols247.com (@govols247) November 10, 2012

If Vols lose this game in OT, that won’t and shouldn’t be forgotten. With this passing game, you ALWAYS have a chance.

— govols247.com (@govols247) November 10, 2012

There is insanity all over the nation. This is college football at its freakiest and funnest.

— Pat Forde (@YahooForde) November 10, 2012

Siri thinks Johnny Manziel is johnboat man seal. Kind of cool.

— @BarkingCarnival (@BarkingCarnival) November 11, 2012

Clarity: Denzel Nkemdiche sacks Jordan Rodgers, points to brother Robert, not brother Aaron. Aaron Rodgers is currently undecided.

— Steven Godfrey (@38Godfrey) November 11, 2012

CYBERTIDE 404 ERROR — TROJAN HORSE “JFOOTBALL”, REBOOT

— Colin Seiler (@colinseiler) November 10, 2012

yeah, it ain’t none of that “deceptive speed” sh t with manziel. it’s pretty obvious.

— Bomani Jones (@bomani_jones) November 10, 2012

The next AT&T commercial should just be a YouTube video of a kicker hitting a 40-yarder and Stoops saying “HELLO”

— Brian Floyd (@BrianMFloyd) November 10, 2012

Someone tell CBS that Johnny is a Castlevania character.

— cuppycup (@cuppycup) November 10, 2012

Can you EVEN IMAGINE how angry Nick Saban will be if Alabama loses to a team led by a freshman quarterback nicknamed Johnny Football?

— Danger Guerrero (@DangerGuerrero) November 10, 2012

Texas A&M still needs a Johnny Run Defense.

— Tom Fornelli (@TomFornelli) November 10, 2012

Belldozer looked more like the LamBellghini on that run. Sooners taking control.

— David Ubben (@davidubben) November 10, 2012

the only possible explanation is that all Big Ten referees are infected with a disease that will kill them if M wins the division.

— mgoblog (@mgoblog) November 10, 2012

“Assuming they faced the average NFL team, just how dominant could Alabama be in skee ball?”

— Mobutu Sese Seko (@Mobute) November 10, 2012

IT’S OVERINFLATED MT @mcmurphyespn: Khalid Holmes on sideline screaming to teammates: “This is not SC football. This is a disgrace.”

— Brian Floyd (@BrianMFloyd) November 10, 2012

Bad decision there by Nick Saban. Gonna favorite my own tweet, because that pretty much never happens.

— TomahawkNation.com (@TomahawkNation) November 10, 2012

Ameer Abdullah appears to be made of mercury. How did he not go down?

— Ralph D. Russo (@ralphDrussoAP) November 10, 2012

Amazing how A&M developed all that SEC speed just since last season.

— Stewart Mandel (@slmandel) November 11, 2012

Hey, Maryland has a WildCrab formation. Appropriately, it ends with the ballcarrier getting his arm ripped off and the meat sucked out.

— Mike Tunison (@xmasape) November 10, 2012

Shout out to Kliff Kingsbury with the 3-day growth and the shades. #yournextheadcoach

— George Schroeder (@GeorgeSchroeder) November 10, 2012

Saban is about to make that D3 golf coach look like Joel Osteen.

— Rick Muscles (@RickMuscles) November 10, 2012

@siholly Now she tells me. My kid is now a pile of sand.

— Metsy (@metschick) November 10, 2012

I said Armageddon was coming. Didn’t think it was this Saturday

— Mark Schlabach (@Mark_Schlabach) November 10, 2012

Carefully, he assembled the package. One Cleveland Browns jersey, size child’s medium, and a note: “You’re almost home, Nick.”

— sir broosk (@celebrityhottub) November 11, 2012

If there is one thing we have learned today it is that these no-huddle spread offenses will never work in SEC and are totally not fair, guys

— Ralph D. Russo (@ralphDrussoAP) November 10, 2012

Hats off to Kevin Sumlin. I don’t know any coach more respected by his peers. And proof nice guys don’t always finish last.

— Bruce Feldman (@BFeldmanCBS) November 11, 2012

The SEC has a month to politic and two of the current contenders don’t play conference championship games.

— John Infante (@John_Infante) November 11, 2012

You want to know how much Auburn fans have given up? I CAN GET A CELL SIGNAL IN JORDAN-HARE #wardamnwireless

— Doug (@CaptainAnnoying) November 11, 2012

Went from watching end of TAMU/Bama straight to Skyfall and now think that the SEC should be the next exotic culture Bond visits.

— Chris Marcil (@ChrisMarcil) November 11, 2012

Bill Snyder’s still rocking the Cotton Bowl pullover. Gotta dance with the windbreaker that brought ya.

— David Ubben (@davidubben) November 11, 2012

The Gene Chizik call-in show is just a loop of the EBS emergency tone on repeat.

— Dawgter Feelgood (@DawgterFeelgood) November 11, 2012

A modest proposal. RT @suckatsports: Hey, if you guys want to beat Nebraska, don’t depend on the refs, just score 63 points.

— Land-Grant Holy Land (@Landgrant33) November 11, 2012

Vandy just drove their Volvo station wagons back in this game. They’re coming at Ole Miss like an NPR pledge drive.

— Rick Muscles (@RickMuscles) November 11, 2012

@jasonkirksbn VANDERBOWL

— Chad Livingston (@chlcocky) November 11, 2012

“What more can I do?” Freeze asked, eyes toward Heaven. “WHO ELSE DO YOU WANT ME TO RETWEET?”

— RaginCajunRebel (@RaginCajunRebel) November 11, 2012

Injury list, Oregon: “OREGON FOOTBALL TEAM.”

— edsbs (@edsbs) November 11, 2012

Marcus Mariota is now 37% nanobot.

— Peter (@runthedive) November 11, 2012

To review, Ducks came into this game with 3 starting D linemen and a backup out, and have had their QB, running back and free safety hurt.

— Rob Moseley (@DuckFootball) November 11, 2012

YOU JUST MAKING DUCK ANGRY CREEPY BEAR

— THE GIANT DUCK (@TheGiantDuck) November 11, 2012

Marcus Mariota had arm amputated, grew new one, looks awesome. Unfair advantage of being half-starfish.

— edsbs (@edsbs) November 11, 2012

Upset alert has been replaced with typical Oregon results.

— George Schroeder (@GeorgeSchroeder) November 11, 2012

Fair Question: Who’s Oregon’s Heisman candidate?

— Dan Rubenstein (@DanRubenstein) November 11, 2012

I’d just like to point out that the last two weekends of college football have been A+++.

— Matt Hinton (@MattRHinton) November 11, 2012