Designated Read: He’s a winter
• Fedora the Explorer alights in Chapel Hill: Golden Eagles skipper Larry Fedora, one of this postseason’s hottest coaching commodities, has reportedly agreed to succeed Butch Davis and interim coach Everett Withers at UNC, according to the Winston-Salem Journal. (I almost didn’t recognize him in that shot without the visor and sunglasses.) Fedora, of course, is fresh off a Conference USA title win gained against the previously undefeated Houston Cougars. Southern Miss was his first head coaching gig at the college level; he previously served as OC at Oklahoma State, Florida and Middle Tennessee State.
• Realignment tidbits, grudgingly dispensed: You know, I got some truly nasty emails when I suggested (in a post with a headline cribbed straight from Jonathan Swift, no less) that the SEC start poaching teams from the southeastern corners of their respective states. Well, the Big East has gone and done me one better, stomping a stiletto heel on the instep of geography with the reported additions of Boise State, San Diego State, Houston, Central Florida and SMU. All of which are quite easterly, from the conference honchos’ presumed floating island fortress in the Pacific. Ready for jokes? Ready for jokes!
“By joining the Big East conference, do these teams automatically qualify for East Coast Bias?” — David Foster
“Maybe the Big East just knows something about plate tectonics and continental drift that the rest of us don’t.” — @celebrityhottub
• The most wonderful time of the year: The release of the gift bag contents for bowlgoers is the best reading of December, every year, without fail. Peruse and behold the majestic bounty of souvenir pens, mini-helmets and commemorative footballs.
• Fresh coaches, bought and sold: Apart from the Fedora development, further news from the carousel: Willy Robinson’s departure from Arkansas reunites the brothers Petrino, and Chad Morris can now afford to have actual live tigers bear him to the practice facility in a sedan chair if he wants.
• Hardware hour: Ben Glicksman’s college football awards primer breaks down all the December trophy races.
• Home for the ruptured: Zach Collaros could be back in action for the Bearcats by the time the Liberty Bowl rolls around.
• Roster blotter: Track the trickle of postseason attrition at Maryland with the Baltimore Sun’s latest Terps roster update.
• Wednesday whimsy: Reading up on Fiesta Bowl finances is always a good time. It’s not wise to upset a future dentist. Maybe stop naming your babies after persons in ever-transient professions? If Matt Barkley’s not your favorite college football player who’s not playing for your own personal alma mater, give him a shot. Ladies, get your trashy Orange Bowl footwear locked down. And this is not football related, but it would make a delightful addition to your local end-of-year talent show or pageant, as a dramatic monologue.